He’d added her in his phone as Charlie Brown. It started as a joke, her name was Charlotte, and when they first met she was wearing a yellow dress with a black, zig-zagged patterned belt. They hit it off right away.
They were in tune. They could make fun of all the other stuffy bankers they worked with. They were the young hip ones, the ones with advanced knowledge of IT systems, and the ones that could spin up a new tool in a few hours, with minimal instructions from the slow, chubby bankers.
They were the golden children and they knew it.
At home they each had partners, he had children, the lot. He had been married for twelve years and was the proud dad of three boys. Secretly he was a bit smug that his genes had won the battle and he had three boys. He never shared it with his wife though, she would have gotten very upset, maybe a bit disappointed, if she knew he held that kind of belief.
Charlie was newly married, had just bought a house, and whenever she got the chance she gushed about her amazing husband. From her descriptions it sounded like he was the be-all and end-all. Sometimes Robert surprised himself being a bit jealous of this amazing super human husband of hers. So, when she let slip bits of dissatisfaction, or alluded to flaws her husband had, he was unexplainably in a good mood for hours on end, sometimes even days.
After a few months she jokingly called herself his work wife. Robert laughed it off, but inside, in the most hidden space of his being, he was unbelievably happy, and that was when he realized his feelings for Charlie were different than those for a co-worker should be. He had no idea how she felt, they were friends, close friends, they texted outside of work, the joked around, sometimes their banter pushed the limits of what was acceptable between two married to other people co-workers, but it never quite passed the line to inappropriate.
That was such a fine line and Robert often fantasied about breaking it, about taking his relationship with Charlie to that next level. They were intimate friends after all, she often confided in him things she confessed she had never told anyone else. Robert had become increasingly distracted, and his wife had begun to notice.
‘Nothing, just work. The economy is kicking our butts!’, his wife understood.
What she did not know was that the economy was working in their favor, other people’s crisis was the bank’s success.
The bubble burst when they were invited to visit a newly opened branch in a different city. They were a team, they went everywhere together, always sat next to each other, they were morphing in one very happy entity. They had their own jokes, they knew each other’s thoughts, a gesture told the other everything they needed to know.
The moment had come, it was the perfect time.
‘Want to come in for a night cup?’, they were standing in the hallway of their four star hotel. His heart was beating so hard it felt like it would break out of his chest.
‘Maybe a tea … sure, I want to talk to you about something anyway…’, her voice sounded nervous and curiosity made Robert hold back.
Once they were sat in the too big room, he prodded her for details.
‘What’s going on?’
‘I have some news…’, she cleared her throat and took a sip of her tea. ‘I am pregnant!’
‘What?’, he was sure he did not hear well.
How could she be pregnant? He could never conceive that she was having sex with her husband. Robert had withdrawn from his wife for months now, he had felt that he could not be with anyone that was not Charlie, not even his wife.
‘I am pregnant! I am so happy! I cannot describe it! We have been trying for so long!’, tears of happiness rolled down her cheeks, and in that moment he could see it, she was indeed pregnant. Her face had gotten rounder, her skin glowed even in the faint light, her hands were plump around the teacup.
‘That is great news!’, he could not recognize his voice as he said the words.
‘I am so happy for you!’, he felt acid rise up in his throat. He hoped she will leave soon, he could not save face for much longer.
‘I will have to go on maternity sooner than later, I want to be really safe. I will miss you!’, and she got up to hug him.
He let her hug him stiff as a board, feeling her as a total stranger, somebody else than the woman she was just a short while before in the hallway.
When she finally left he cried, but he did not cry for her, for the loss of her, her cried for himself, for the pain he felt when he understood he had fallen in love with a person that never existed, Charlie Brown.
Robert changed the name in the phone, and mourned the death of a dream. The death of Charlie Brown.
He called in sick for two weeks, then he took the family on vacation for another two weeks, then some works to the house forced him to work remote for a month and a bit. When he finally got back to the office Charlotte was visibly pregnant, she had gained quite a bit of weight and, to him, she resembled a bopping bee walking around the office.
They spoke briefly, but there was a lot of work to be done. She invited him to dinner, but he had family commitments. He did attend her going on maternity gathering, presenting her with a baby present which, he declared, somewhat ostentatiously, that his wife had to pick for him because he was useless at things like that.
And then, she was gone, and the world turned quiet. His inner turmoil settled and soon he was able to go back to his old self, the one before the delusion.
To himself, Robert explained it as a moment of madness, the fact that it took a few good months had left him scarred and scared. He did not trust in his ability to judge or evaluate relationships.
When his phone rang and her name appeared on the caller ID he was surprised. They hadn’t spoken in months.
‘Hello?’
‘Hello, is this Bob?’, a soft, anxious male voice replied.
‘Well, Robert, but yeah some people call me Bob. Who is this?’
‘I am looking for Bob the Builder.’
‘What? Is this a joke?’, Robert was amused.
‘You are in my wife’s phone, Charlotte. You might have done some work for us … We need a builder for an extension, and I saw your contact here and wanted to see if you can help... We’d pay well!’
Robert barely contained a hysteric laugh.
‘Sorry mate, I am all booked up. Best of luck!’
‘Oh, ok, thank you… Do you …?’
‘Sorry gotta go! On a job!’, and he hung up, letting out the strangest laughter that had ever past his lips.
Bob the Builder, go figure!