The woman walked slowly glancing at her phone and then around her. She was never able to figure out which direction that Google maps arrow was pointing towards. Only when she saw it eating up little dots on the map she was sure she was going in the right direction. Crumlin boasted handsome houses with large green spaces between them. She had never been, or maybe she had passed through by bus but never registered it.
The phone showed she is just a few minutes away from the address she was looking for, but instead of feeling relived she felt dread and doubt. Was she crazy to come here to see this woman? Sally had convinced her! God knows how Sally had this power of convincing people of the stupidest things! She should run for president at some point! She could charm the skin off a snake!
Although, in fairness, she herself was to blame for blabbing on and on about her troubles, Sally was just trying to help. What in the world possessed her to get involved with two men at the same time? It was so out of character! Now she was in so deep with both of them that she had no idea how to go further! If she chose one, should she admit that at some point there had been two? Will she lose both? The rabbit saying came into her mind! Annoying ancestral knowledge!
Sally went on and on and on how the clairaudient can help her clarify to herself what she should do! Clairaudient, what a word! She had to google it. People that hear things! But, is it not like they hear the dead? She had asked Sally, very suspicious of this new information that had just entered her world.
Yeah, yeah, that too! Buuut! Buuut! Sally had brought her face very close to hers to make sure she had her undivided attention. It is much more than that! She can hear the future! You in your future saying things! It is outstanding! Trust me! She will blow your mind!
Famous last words!
But, she did take the advice and had made an appointment online. What a world where you can book a clairaudience appointment online, pay for it and then you just go about as it is another normal thing in your day.
Finally, she stopped in front of an inconspicuous three bed semi-detached house that could have been in any street in Ireland. Nothing about it drew attention, if anything, it seemed almost to blend in the row of houses it was part of.
Paula struggled a bit with the drive gate, but then, when she stepped in she was surprised to see that from up close the house looked so much brighter and more colorful. If felt like she had stepped through a wall of transparent fog which kept the house faded and once past that, a burst of color rejoiced the senses paired with beautiful, enchanting smells.
While she stood there, admiring the flowers around her, the big blue door opened and a woman stepped out of the shadows. She was everything Paula did not expect a clairaudient to be. Instead of a New Age tie-dye kind of person, the woman was wearing high-heels, a grey wool two-piece, perfectly tailored to her, glasses and a strict bun on top of her head. She looked more like a corporate accountant than somebody claiming to hear voices.
Paula felt overwhelmed by the entire circumstance and remained there, pinned in place, looking at the woman that had invited her in. Understanding the situation, the latter walked out of the house, after blocking the door with her foot by pushing with her impeccable shoe a big door-stopper in the shape of a black cat.
‘I have to do that! You have no idea how many times I locked myself out! And the only way in is to climb over the back gate! Do you see me doing that in this outfit? No way!’, she gave a warm, relaxed smile while extending her hand.
‘Caragh O’Reilly! Nice to meet you!’, she was now closer and Paula was drawn in towards her without really knowing why.
‘Paula Smith, nice to meet you too!’, in a strange way this introduction relaxed Paula and she felt able to follow the woman in the house.
The interior proved to be yet another surprise, it could have been literally any house in Ireland, nothing memorable, nothing meant to stand out. With the corner of her eye, Paula could swear she had seen the door stopper cat get up and walk away giving her an arrogant look.
‘Come, come!’
The woman opened a door that was not easily visible as you walked into the house, actually, if it hadn’t been pointed out, you would for sure miss it and just go past it not registering it is there.
When Paula walked in she was dumbfounded. The space, that from outside seemed a small box room under the stairs, was actually a large living room with walls covered top to bottom in bookshelves. There was a large fireplace and on the wall above it there was a large mirror adorned with a steel rose frame. Strangely enough the mirror seemed to be something like a TV, as it showed a winder landscape with big snowflakes falling. The room was warm though, heated by a bright fire burning in the fireplace.
Oh, wow, she really went all out to create the setting didn’t she?! Paula thought to herself while taking a seat on a chair that the woman had indicated.
‘I made us some tea! Nothing like a hot cup of tea on weather like this!’, Caragh said pointing to the scenery in the mirror.
Paula did not know if she should laugh or just get up and leave. It was full blown summer outside, the flowers were in bloom, the woman seemed not all there. Not being able to decide what to do she just sat put. Freaking embarras du choix! She really needs to sort that out!
‘Shall we begin?’, Caragh’s voice was soft and understanding.
Paula nodded not really sure what to expect.
‘Tell me, how can I help?’
Silence. Paula felt that now, when she was put on the spot she could not put into words her query. She was surprised to discover that she was ashamed to tell this woman about her goings on. For sure she will think she is a floozy, easy and with no morals. Her grandmother would be so disappointed in her!
Seeming to understand everything that was not being said, Caragh reached out over the table reaching out for Paula’s hands.
‘May I?’
Nodding, Paula allowed her to take her hands and cover them with her own perfectly manicured ones. Strangely enough, on the right hand, the clairaudient had a green, sparkling ring that reminded Paula even more of her grandmother, the woman that had brought her up when her own mother, struggling with depression and anxiety, left to join a permanent retreat in the Slieve Bloom mountains. More like a cult, her granny used to mumble when she got all worked up, but at least she seemed ok there, aloof and not really connected to the world, but at least alive, and sometimes that is all a parent can hope for.
‘Tell me, how can I help?’
The warm touch, the sight of the ring, the memories of her grandmother whom she had not thought of for so long helped her to open up in a way she did not expect she would be able to in front of a stranger.
‘I am so stupid! I got involved with two men, and the problem is they are both so great and so loving, but I just cannot go on, I cannot keep lying to them, I am starting to hate myself more and more, I am not able to make a decision though, I just do not know which is the best choice, and I do not want to give both of them both. And then, after I choose, do I tell the truth? Do I admit to lying for so long? I am running after two rabbits, will I lose them both?’
She took a pause to breathe and as the clairaudient did not say anything she continued.
‘I feel so ashamed, but it just happened! If I look back I do not even know to pin point the moment when I started lying to them. It just grew so fast this situation that now I am overwhelmed and I do not know how to get out of it. I need your help to figure this out! Which one do I choose? I need to make sure I am choosing right, I do not want to find myself ten years from now thinking what might have happened if I had chosen the other one. I want to be sure I am making the right choice and be happy with it.’
Caragh smiled, let go of Paula’s hands and leaned back in her chair. Her eyes were bright and at close inspection it was like you could see the light in them moving at the same speed with her thoughts. She took a sip of the tea in which a sprawled purple flower was floating.
‘Ok, I get it.’, Caragh was nodding her head in understanding.
‘Have some tea!’
Prompted, Paula could not refuse and picked up the beautifully decorated china cup. The flower in the tea looked unusual but the tea itself tasted amazing, like hibiscus and pineapple, as it was lukewarm she just drank it all leaving the purple flower stranded at the bottom of the cup. Looking at it Paula could swear she saw it sparkle, but then her attention was drawn again to the ring on Caragh’s finger. The ring seemed to catch the reflection of the falling snowflakes in the mirror and light was moving inside it.
When Paula looked up she was startled to find herself facing her not so long lost grandmother. Strangely enough she was not scared, she just felt the happiness of recognizing somebody you deeply love in front of you.
‘Granny!’
The woman smiled and Paula was overwhelmed with warmth and joy.
‘Granny, I miss you so much! Oh Granny, I am in trouble! Please don’t hate me!’
The woman facing her shook her head.
‘Paula honey, what did I tell you it is very important to do in your life?’, the voice was that of her grandmother’s and in quick succession it brought back in Paula’s mind all the advice her grandmother had given her over the years. Which one, there were so many?!
‘Be good to myself? Be compassionate? I don’t know …’
Silence fell and the woman in front was just watching her, waiting.
Paula closed her eyes trying to remember.
‘I know! Be true to myself!’
When she opened her eyes she was faced again with the clairaudient looking at her intently.
‘Oh, I like the sound of that!’, the woman sounded nothing like her grandmother now.
Paula shook her head in confusion and felt like she had just come back from a deep sleep.
‘I can swear I heard my grandmother! That I saw her! That is not possible …’
‘Oh but it is! I heard her too! She sounds like one hell of a woman! Cookie? Peanut butter, made them myself!’
Paula declined the offer, she still had her doubts about the tea she had been given.
‘They are here if you change your mind. A good seance always makes me so peckish.’
And she started to gingerly munch away at one of the large cookies.
‘Tell me about her, your grandmother.’
Paula sat in the warm, cozy room and was reminded of similar moments spent in her past in the company of her granny, in front of a fire and with the rain tapping against the windows. Life made sense then, her grandmother had a clear cut way of looking at things that just seemed to always dissipate any doubts one might have had.
Thinking about it, talking about it, it all came back to the forefront of her mind and all the old woman’s teachings came alive again in her. Out of them, the most important one Be true to yourself.
When she left the inconspicuous house in Crumlin, Paula felt a wave of gratitude to the woman that had supported her to reconnect with her inner self, to Sally for pushing her to come here and to her grandmother for teaching her how to live a fulfilled life at peace with herself.
Paula now knew she will make a decision and that it will be the right decision for her, true to herself and fair to those she loved.