‘Like, to be honest, one of the things I don’t like about you is that you talk too much!’
She sounded casual, friendly, her same old self, only she was telling me this thing that totally took me by surprise. I did not know what to reply, I watched her munch her carrots (yet on another diet) and stare into space.
‘And all those baggy clothes, you could try to dress more like a woman, not like a hanger with way too many clothes on it… you are not that thin either so they just make you look …’, she stared into space even more intently, then after a short pause she blurted it out, ‘…bulkier, yes that is the word, bulkier.’
Crunch, crunch, crunch, she went on impassively.
I was a bit hurt, a bit offended, a lot shocked, she never had said those kinds of things to me and I was baffled by the sudden bout of honesty. And not any kind of honesty, the kind that is seemingly draped in good intentions, but actually means to sting to the core.
‘So, how have you been?’, I asked in a dry tone deciding to be the better person and look over the unexpected so called honesty.
She sighed deeply and almost chocked on a fragment of carrot.
‘Not as good as you.’, she said despisingly on an almost mean tone.
Ok, now I was starting to get really annoyed, she had asked me to meet her, I had taken the bus from the edge of the city, and now she was behaving like this. I am a nice person, but still, I do not appreciate people being rude to me.
‘To be honest I have not been that good lately.’, my voice was downcast and painful.
Weirdly enough her eyes brightened and for the first time she looked straight at me.
‘You know how I had a little pain in my heel, it kept growing and I went to the doctor, it seems I have plantar fasciitis caused most likely by my excess weight, the doctor advised anti-inflammatory meds, but I must lose weight that is first and foremost …’
She was now smiling at me, almost looking like herself, but in my eyes, she still had a sparkle of meanness lighting her eyes.
‘ … because my foot hurts I cannot walk very well or exercise so I must start by controlling what I eat and that has always been my downfall … I just like food too much …’, now I was truly in pain and depressed, all my own struggles came flooding over me and I was left joyless.
‘I think I need to go, it is a long way back.’, I got up and grabbed my bag.
‘Oh no, don’t go! I don’t want to be alone!’, her voice was whiny and annoying.
‘I think I must! Take care!’
I left feeling bad about myself, about the meeting, about her.
The voice of my ancestors rang in my mind Misery loves company. Funny how time washes over us but the human being, at its core, in its essence is unchanged.
Misery, that is a good book!
I caught the bus and took out the book inhabiting my bag. I settled in for the long bus ride and just after a page or two my phone vibrates in my pocket. As I am having difficulties focusing on the reading anyway I take it out and check.
It is a post from her, my friend. She posted a selfie in the place I just left her, all smiling and beaming with the caption: Strong and beautiful! Lost 10 kilos! Feeling better than ever! Haters gonna hate!
I put the phone in my pocket, and hugging my book I stare aimlessly out the window lost in my thoughts.
The truth is you never know do you what a person is going through. Do you?
Sometimes they don’t know themselves …